Hi Depression,

Sorry I missed your call earlier, but I am calling you now. I know it’s that time of year you’d like to kick it. I’d love that too.

I’m ready to be alone, with you

Rot in memories of childhood trauma

Ready to turn off the lights and sit alone

In the dark

Drink the cup of suffering, downing memories of going to bed hungry, sharing dirty bathwater, getting beat with fist like I was a grown man

Waking up on christmas with no gifts waiting for a man to come down a chimney we never had

Hugging my brother just to stay warm

Eating food in grocery stores to feed our bellies, stealing just to stop the growling

Yes, Depression, I’m inviting you to dinner.

But this year, I want you to meet my family

The ones who’ve been with me through my mental struggles, the tears, my rage, my anger, my silence, and our not able to eat for days, frozen for weeks in a tundra perilous pain in desert of life’s droughts

I want you to meet the woman who loves me and the daughter who cherishes me

People in my life who would die for me to live

People who know all my mistakes, shortcomings, failures, and still say, “You are God’s child”

Friends who have given me far more memories of greatness that double the amount of memories my past could dare hope for

All my successes, accomplishments, compassion, dreams, love, giving birth, nurturing and helping others

Yes, I want to spend time with you

So you can meet the people who have kept us living this whole time

Who have taught us to keep loving, keep striving, keep fighting, and who balances our imbalance

This year depression I don’t want to be alone with you and our past

A seat is here for you; at the table; amongst friends

Who’ve never got to tell you,

“Welcome to the family, you are not alone!”