A Moment of Transparency
With my breathing issues being severe a few days, I had a recall from childhood. A rare glimpse of a moment with my biological mother. I was having an asthma attack. No one in our Ida B Wells project building had a telephone or car. She ran me down three flights of stairs into the streets screaming and no one would help. She Finally a middle eastern man in a car with a strong accent and bare spoke English took us to Michael Reese. So many of “us” passed by. While I don’t know of his citizenship status, all I know is that man helped my mom save my life. So while I am big on secure borders, I am empathetic to a stranger who helped us. His hope in America was a godsend you could be blessed with me. 😉🥹😁
I am thankful for JAH reminding me how long has watched over me. I don’t wear long suffering as a badge of honor, it is a life-fruit of The Endurer. Even with stints of homelessness, I am a miracle He made. He never left me uncovered. Cuz Arlene, Cuz Tricia, MaMa Wells, Big Sis Des, Big Bro AD, Joyce Craft, Linda Williams, Big Homie Craig Sandifer, Camp Rosenthal; I have been so blessed. If you ask why I am a Christian it’s because of the Love I have discovered in Yeshua.
My relationship with my mom is complicated, intricate, and I still show up when I am able. I don’t spend a lot of time talking about others household because my life has been one big mixture of chaos, over extending myself for unreciprocated love, and it’s easier to talk about folks than deal with your own stuff. When I see how my wife’s family loves on each other every single day I try to make things right. My past wreaks. I haven’t been the greatest brother, friend, uncle, cousin, or godfather but I tried to get fatherhood right. How can you be envious of providing your child a life you never experienced? Insane, right???
I paused to say that memories will surface. Often the bad before the good. However, at the moment that good one comes, let it saturate, marinate, and know that there has been more love than hate, more joy than sorrow, more ups than downs, and you are still here pressings on. May you come to know Yeshua’s love as I have. It saves, it keeps, it builds, it forgives, and it lives. As He mends my heart daily when I wash it with His Word, I know it shall also restore.
Have a good night, beloveds.
